The cries of a young woman echo from
behind a door of the blue-collar apartments. The yelps and pleas for help are
much louder than the babies screams from across the lawn or the rowdy man
beating on his wife and emaciated children. Inside that plain green portal are
things never imagined.
She sits at her little dingy brown
table breathing heavily, her hands holding her sweating forehead as she looks
down her nose at her weak breakfast with a pale face and wide blue eyes that
have all her emotions swimming in them.
She closes those gorgeous blue eyes
so full of ache, groaning out in pain. Burning white-hot beneath her skin, she
sucks the air through her teeth, trying not to notice the sting. The sensation
reminds her of having a sharp rock thrown at the small of her back.
She utters a little something to
herself while clutching her head.
She gasps as she feels that familiar
tug on her being. She screams as her body is launched into the wall behind her,
throwing her chair back, leaving another dent in the wall. She lay on the
floor, breathing heavily as her body gets dragged into the middle of the dirty living
room floorboards. The sound of her nails scraping the wood is supported by the
nail bites from being hauled along. She quickly crumples into a ball, apathetically
expecting the next blow.
Her pretty face bruised, her slender
body battered; she was only so young; all her privileges of being careless and
free snatched away from her. She is stuck in her small apartment, in her
prison, for forever, until she dies. That day is yet to come.
"Oh please, take it away, take
it away," she whispers, tucking her head between her knees as she lay in
the fetal position. Her answer is louder than her whisper and it throws the
girl into the abandoned chair. She grabs it, digging her nails into it as she
had done thousands of other times. But to no avail. Clinging never saved her.
She isn’t allowed anything that
could start a fire, such as a television set or radio. She has to live her life
alone, for forever, until she dies. That day is yet to come.
She is everyone's beaten Sorrow.
Her head gets bashed against her
stiff couch. She doesn’t fall unconscious; she can’t, it just isn't possible.
She'd stopped believing the truth in God a long time ago, but she still asks
Him every single day of her wounded life, "Take it away… please just take
it all away…" As her battered body still never broke and her heart kept
mending itself back together, not letting her go; never skipping a beat.
Every lie came to her. Every bad
thought, intention, or action. Yet the people who created them still got to
live on happily. She would never be happy, because she never could be happy.
Because people do bad things. She isn’t allowed to be cheerful. Or pretty, or
smart. Or proud, or lovable. She has convinced herself that she was never
anything good.
She is everyone's painful Destiny.
The thing that would be us all if
she had never existed. She, the girl who hides it all in front of company,
rarely receives gifts. Never leaves her house, because she cares too much about
everyone else, even though they are the ones who burden her. She endures the
pain and suffering just so they may have their moments of peace; she accepts it
without complaint. She gazes into her mirror when she has a moment to herself, and
sees the hurt and twinge of cruelty swimming in those sky-blue eyes that hold
such potential. Sees the happiness attempting to cover the vindictiveness of
the world, because she knows; she understands; that she is giving the greatest
gift of all.
She’s accepting your damned Fate.